Josh's Story

I assume a lot of you get sick of hearing about Boston and I so often... understandable... I talk people's ears off about her. I sometimes hear of peoples stories who have had to go through so much and handle their trials like champions. She is a friend of my oldest sister, Alicia, I wanted to share this story I asked to put on my blog so we could all send an few extra prayers to this family, I am not the most religious person, BUT I do believe prayers help.

XO:
Ashlynn&Boston BRONSON

PS***the winner of the first give-a-way is announced tomorrow you can still participate!

TUESDAY, APRIL 9, 2013

Josh's Story!

My friend asked me if she could share Josh's story on her blog in the next couple of days.  This is what I came up with and what we went through and learned.  I hope it works, right?

"Ashlynn asked me if I would write about "Josh's Story" on her blog.  First of all, we are huge followers of her blog.  She's amazing for all she's been through and keeps going through.  She's taught me so much.  This is a story about my 7 year old's journey with a tumor.  I hope you can learn how it was from a personal perspective and what we learned.  Thanks for sharing this on your blog, Ashlynn.

Josh's story actually began at a young age.  When he was 8 weeks old, I had a feeling to go check on him.  When I went into his room, he wasn't breathing.  We rushed him to the hospital and when we got there we found out that he had RSV.  A pretty severe case and we spent almost 2 weeks in the hospital.  Even after that, we went home with oxygen and breathing treatments.  After that horrifying experience, he kept getting sick.  Pneumonia, real flu, and ear infections.  I got so I wouldn't take him to church or really around anyone.  I couldn't keep him healthy.  

When he was 2 years old, he had tonsils and adenoids removed and tubes placed in his ears.  Just a year and half ago I took him in for another ear infection.  Apparently he had gotten holes in both ear drums from the tubes.  We had one ear repaired and waited to see what would happen with the other ear.  Over a couple of months the other ear healed completely on it's own.  This surgery was our first tympanoplasty.  It was not a very fun surgery.  They had to remove his ear and patch the hole and then we thought we were done for awhile.

Josh is now a 7 year old, happy/easy-going little boy.  He brings so much joy to my heart.  He loves everything about life.  This winter, December and January, Josh started getting bloody noses.  Lots of them, 4-5 gushing ones a day.  I had tried everything to get them to stop.  Nothing worked and he would often cry himself to sleep.  I knew it was time to go see Dr. Blotter, our ENT.  He initially didn't see anything other than his tympanoplasty had sunk back down, making it look like his ear was shrink wrapped.  He decided to send him for a hearing test.  At that point we were told he had a 90% hearing loss and the pressure in his ear drum was unreal!  He decided to take him back and look at it under the microscope.  That is how my son was diagnosed with at tumor called a cholesteatoma or "pearl tumor".  It wasn't that fast, we had to do some blood work and a ct scan.  Josh really didn't understand what was going on at the time or that he would even be needing another surgery.  He had a hole on the other side of his ear drum again.  We knew he was going to end up having major surgery.

For me, I have been through a lot, not only with him.  Some of my trials have included; a brother in-law passing away, a dad with terminal cancer, having a preemie baby with severe preeclampsia and other heart and blood pressure issues.  My parents home burning down and loosing my childhood.  Then a hysterectomy on top of all of that.  I'm a fairly tough person, well at least I think.  I have learned a lot from all of these experiences and in different ways.  I would be lying if I told you that I was faithful through the entire journey that everything would work out.  I had somehow lost my faith through this battle to survive the heartache that I felt.  My son's tumor just added to some stress in my life.  Through this experience, I knew what I needed to do from personal experience.  I knew that God was watching over us and totally aware of our circumstances.  That the only way as a mother I would make it through this was to rely 100% on faith and courage in trusting in my Heavenly Father.  I wrote in my journal about what I was learning each day, so that I could note how far we had come through this journey.  I know for a fact that as Josh's mother, I wouldn't have been able to make it through this without God by my side.  Through this experience I learned a ton to relying on the spirit, that God had a plan for Josh and that he would NEVER abandon us when we needed him most.

 
Here are some journal entries from what we've been through.  First of all, we witnessed miracles going through this experience.  One of the first ones was right when he was diagnosed.  “when I first heard that Josh had a tumor some thoughts came to my mind. ‘Tiesha, this isn’t yours. God is the orchestrator. Hand it over to Him.’ Gladly. I instantly handed over my son to God knowing He was completely aware of him and had a plan. I was not in charge. I trusted God completely. I had faith in His will.”

Miracle #2 was when we had priesthood blessings and were told the things that we needed to be told.  For Josh, he was told that he was going to lead many others to his Savior through his experience.  It was true.  In a little over one month we had 2,000 people view his blog.  You can read it at http://joshhart2.blogspot.com  Our doctor said there were only two physician's in the state that were trained to take out this particular type of tumor.  He asked me to call them and if I couldn't get him in pretty fast, that he would send a recommendation.  I was praying every second of every minute that we could get him in promptly because of how sick he had become.  I called Dr. Peterson in West Jordan.  He is usually booked out for a good 6-9 months.  The receptionist explained that it was our lucky day because 2 minutes before this time, they had another cancellation.  I said, "it's luck to you but not to me, I know this was an answer to a mother's prayers."  He had an appt the very next day.

Stressed out momma!

Josh thought that he was a boring old man. ha ha He was taking pictures of all of us on my phone.  He was a wonderful doctor and spent 3 hours with us to explain everything. He even allowed me to view the tumor via microscope. He watched me cry and understood. I'm very impressed and very blessed to have found such a wonderful person. Even if he's boring. ha ha At least he knows how to save lives. :)

I guess I should explain that this particular type of tumor is benign.  The only problem is that it had a high percentage of coming back again and it was large in size.  We had options.  I prayed harder than I probably ever have in my entire life, to know what was right for my son and his future.  I was scared and frustrated to be going through all of this but when I would pray, I would feel peace.  Like I wrote on his blog.  

“In this very room there’s quite enough love for one like me,
And in this very room there’s quite enough joy for one like me,
And there’s quite enough hope and quite enough power to chase away any gloom,
For Jesus, Lord Jesus … is in this very room.”

I learned that in those exact moments when I was upset or frustrated or my faith was failing, to continue to rely on what I know.  I had wonderful parents, they have taught me well.  I know what's right and wrong.  Now it was my turn to teach my son what I had learned.

We ended up having to pull him out of school about one month before surgery because he was so sick.  We got it worked out with the school.  They would send a home tutor out to help do homework and take homework back and forth from Birch Creek Elementary.  They are wonderful teachers and we couldn't have been more blessed.  That was definitely our miracle #3!

We learned fast that we couldn't be negative and allow Satan to drag us down in our moment of weakness.  He has certainly done that to me before and he works very hard to kick you while you are already on your lowest lows.  I'm thankful for our hard knocks in life because that's what makes me continue to rely on and trust in my Savior.  I know how it feels to feel like all hope is lost.  There truly is only one way out and that is through the atonement and my Savior, Jesus Christ.  He truly understands our circumstances and succors our every need.  Now it was my turn to allow Josh to feel and hurt at times.  There would be no other way for him to make it through this.  He needed to learn that, even at the young age of 7 years old.

I also knew that if I got the word out, we could get an army of people to pray and fast for Josh and our family through this trial.  I know that truly happened.  There were times that we were simply being carried and that we wouldn't have had the strength to make it through alone.

Each day I had him write down something he was grateful for that day.  I suffer from depression and I know that giving myself pep-talks and remembering all of my blessing helps me to stay strong and not loose faith.  I also had Josh write a note of all the things he had learned through the journey.  He amazed many people.  I had people from my childhood, to people that I've just recently met watching his story, praying for him and boosting us when we had nothing left.  

Pretty soon the day of surgery had arrived.  We had a preop appt. and met with the person that would administer his radiation therapy drugs.  It was a scary realization for a mother.  But we don't want to have repeat this over again.  We hope that this battle is over.  They will keep a close eye on his ear from here on out to reassure us that it won't come back again.

The night before surgery, the kids went to bed, I guess I don't like thinking about my kids having major surgery.  I was thinking about all that we had been through and how thankful I was for my little kids that were right there with me and how I would NEVER ask for anything more than what I already have.  My family is my entire life.  Life just wouldn't be okay without any of them.  Kayden (older brother) broke down and cried and said that he really didn't want Josh to have surgery.  He said, "mom, I would do it for him."  I thought about how he would do it but how much Josh has taught me and that it was his trial and that he was going to come through leading many to his Savior and how to be strong, even when he was only 7 years old. 

6 a.m. came quickly...too quickly!  Once we got to the hospital I was calm and knew it was going to be fine.  I still prayed all day long.  Josh was calm and just wanted his little scentsy lion "roarburt"!  Then it was Josh's turn.  I hugged and kissed him and watched him walk down the hall.  I had to choke back the tears.  I felt calm but it's never easy watching your sweeties have surgery.

X marks the spot!

  I went and started waiting....and waiting...and waiting....then eventually, it had been 3 hours.  His doctor told me that it would be a 3 hour surgery.  I prayed the entire time, I kept trying to read, but then I finally decided I wouldn't get much out of my book.  I would try another time, right?  I felt like I was starting to panic, every minute started to SLOWLY slide by.  I was thinking, "the doctor said 3 hours and it's been 3 hours and 2 minutes." ha ha  (I must be a mother).  Then 3 1/2 hours.  I finally decided that I should get a nurse and find out how it was going or if she had seen him in recovery.  She went back to look and came out and said, "wow, he has been in there for a long time, huh?"  She said she would keep an eye out for me.  Then 4 hours came and I started to FREAK OUT!!!  I tried to call my husband and say that Josh died today.  I couldn't get him on his cell, (it was probably a good thing).  I was shaking relentlessly, having a full blown panic attack.  I kept telling myself, "that's nice, you're a fantastic mom, you killed your son trying to remove his tumor."  Then the nurse came in and said, "are you okay?"  I started to cry, "NO!  My son still isn't out and it's been over 4 hours!"  She said she would go check again.  She said the good news is if they said he's okay, he's probably okay.  I took that as good news.  I started praying.  "Heavenly Father, I know I probably deserve all of this, but can you please help me know my sweet son is okay.  I'm not asking for much, just PLEASE take care of my sweet boy."  The tears would not leave my eyes.  It was a hard moment for me.  I felt a rush of the spirit confirming that he was going to be fine.  I'm sure my Heavenly Father was very aware of the situation because I felt almost stronger than I ever have in my entire life, that the room was full of angels to comfort me.  I felt like I had a team of people cheering me on.  On FB the people that wrote me messages and notes and encouraging me to stay strong, is a moment of love that I can't describe.  Then after 4 1/2 hours the nurse came and said, "Josh is out!"  THAT WAS THE BEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE!  I just wanted to hold him.  I feel blessed having him be in my life.  I started bawling.  Poor nurse. ha ha  I'm sure they are used to crazy mothers, but that was one LONG morning! The doctor came in and said everything went well.  They had a hard time starting his IV and ended up with 7 pokes trying to get it started. :(  He just explained to me that it's such a delicate surgery and especially on a 7 year old ear.  He wanted to do this right.

When he came out of surgery, the very first thing he did was reach over and pull out his IV.  They were just about to give him some pain meds and zofran.  When he came out he started throwing up and his pain level was not good.  For about 2 hours straight he sobbed and I know the anesthetic makes them weird, but this little guy was in pure pain.  They tried meds orally, but they didn't kick in and they had to give him 2 doses.  Finally by 3 p.m. he had a nap.  We had to stay one more night and then we went home the very next day.  That night Josh lost a tooth, making it a very wild and interesting day.

A few days after this experience, Josh explained to me how my grandma was there to comfort him after surgery and she wanted me to know she loved me.  Definitely another miracle!

We are going back down to West Jordan this week for a post op appt.  His hearing still isn't completely repaired.  We will not lose hope, we will trust and believe in all that we have learned.  He still might end up with a hearing aid but that's nothing compared to what he's already been through.  We will follow up with his story in a few days."