2-24-12

Currently the situation in Boston and my lives I have to treat as a joke, because that is what it is turning into. Instead of dealing with that any further I am going to talk about my book... I was talking to a co-worker about the fact that I didnt even know where to start writing. She gave me the obvious answer that I have three choices; I could either start at the beginning, the middle or the end. The beginning would obviously be my relationship with Bostons dad, and that is a subject I dont want to plunge into yet, the end hasn't occurred yet so I decided that to help practice getting my book just right I am going to make this post about what happened right after Boston was born.

Boston was born on February 24, 2012 at 3:57 pm. I was in labor for almost 24 hours before she graced us with her presence, she is stubborn, I suppose like me. It was the longest 24 hours of my life, I literally threw up and passed out the ENTIRE time, but in retrospect thinking about it now I would rather be in labor for a week straight than to be pregnant again. Boston was born and they quickly rushed her out of the room to get worked on. Since I was in labor so long and was so sick I passed on some infections to Boston and she had to be looked at right away. I remember they took her and finally all nurses and the Dr left my room for a bit. I just layed there shaking and had no idea what just happened; I didnt know where my baby was and I was scared. Twenty minutes went by and a nurse came back in, she brought me the Coke I had been begging for and reassured me that my baby was okay. Finally they came and got me put me in a wheelchair and brought me to see Boston. I made it very clear that I got to be the first person to hold her. Even though I was exhausted and still moderately drugged up, that is a moment that I will never forget. I held her for the first time, and looked at her for the first time, but I felt like I already knew her. In that moment I knew I loved her more than I could ever love anything. Anyone who is a mom has probably felt this and you cant even begin to describe it until you are in that moment. I only spent a short time with her till I had to sleep and rest. While I slept all I could think about was my little 7 pound 1 once miracle.


We spent the next week in the NICU, every morning when I woke up I would get so excited to look at her and see if she looked different than the night before, it was like Christmas for a week straight. Sometimes, I still get excited to see her each morning. On our fourth day there they had to put the IV in Boston's head since her little tiny arms were too small for it to work there. I cried and cried, worse than she did, now we have great pictures to show her when she gets bigger though.

*** Even we though while I was in labor there was someone who kept trying to interrupt Bostons birth and make it about her it remains hands down the best day of my life. I know this sounds dramatic but when I think about what happened the next week I almost get a panic attack. I am going to try writing about it tomorrow so I can start working better on the book. Boston and I want to thank everyone who loves and supports us. Its crazy what we have to deal with.... Thank you for all of your thoughts, prayers, kind thoughts and messages. It was nice today to focus on my sweet baby rather than the people who keep bringing us to their level.

XO:
ashlynn&boston BRONSON

I belong to you! You belong to me! You're my sweetheart!