The kind of mom I want to be

When I look at social media I get sort of depressed. I see all these moms with perfect pictures with perfect hair and their perfect family. They always have handmade crafts and backdrops on their instagram pictures that are the perfect chevron. They make delicious meals and make it seem effortless. I will probably never be one of those moms. Half the time my hair is pulled up, makeup sometimes is a time waster, and the closest thing I come to making a craft is making anklets. I hope that I'm not the only mom who feels overwhelmed by social media moms.

After feeling somewhat discouraged I decided I needed to make a list of the kind of mom that I want to become.

* I want to be healthy and in shape. I will never be stick thin or super toned but I want to set a good example of a healthy lifestyle for Boston. No, I can't make it to the gym daily, but I can take Boston on stroller walks or anything simple. I might not be able to make fresh smoothies daily but I can show her by example that water is better than soda and apples are the better snack than chocolate.

* I want to never yell at my baby. I want to be able to scold her, teach her, reprimand her but never yell at her.

*I want to be a silly mom, that builds forts and does weird dances and plays with her child. I want to be the mom playing in the water at the pool and doing handstand on the beach with her little girl.

*I want to be a fun mom, one that when she gets older she won't mind hanging out with and she will want to let me in our her life details.

* Although I want to be the fun mom I also want to be her mom before being her friend. I want us to get along but I want her to realize I am the mom before I am the friend (on a side note I secretly hope that at one point in her teen years I can completely embarrass her).

* With all the news stories about kids being bullied I get so nervous for Boston. I often feel like I either need to homeschool her or teach her to be a bully. After a long talk with a good friend I have decided I want to teach her to be kind, never be mean, but to stand up for herself if someone chooses to be mean to herself or any of her peers. Never throw the first punch... Ever... But make sure to be throw that last.

*I want to be unique and strange and be comfortable with that so that Boston knows its also okay to be unique and strange.

* I want to be the type of mom that spoils their child, but with love and attention rather than material objects.

*I want to teach my Boston to be involved... from dance to piano to art club to chess club to cheerleading... And that she is supported for in whatever hobbies she chooses.

* I want to be the kind of mom that makes our home a happy place to be where Boston can feel safe and loved.

*I want to be the type of mom to teach Boston that the world does not revolve around her, but I never want her to doubt that MY world revolves around her.

*I want to be the kind of mom who is gentle but firm; and knows how and when to say NO.

* Like I have stated before I could care less if my Boston ever says a nice thing to or about her dads current woman,(she has been nothing but vindictive and hurtful to me and having her constantly complain to others about mike having to pay child support is not respectful to my daughter a all) I do however want to be the kind of mom that teaches her child to respect her "dad"and see the good qualities that I once saw in him (this may end up being the hardest goal).

*Boston is beautiful. I hear it a lot. She is going to grow up to be beautiful. She has amazing eyes, perfect olive skin, thick dark hair. Our world is vain. I want to be the type of mom that teaches that it's fun and great to be told she is pretty but her self worth does not depend on her outer appearance.

I remember once I said really stupid things like "When I'm a mom I'm still going to wear two piece swimsuits and I never want to wear 'mom jeans'". I now am aware that what you wear or don't wear doesn't define you as a mom, along with the pictures you take or the money you spend; there are all sorts of types no one is really better than the other as long as they do the best they can for their kid(s).

Today there is so much freaking stress to be the "perfect mom"... Doing bake sales and crafts and being in tip top shape along with keeping clean, perfectly dressed kids... It can cause many women to get a Xanax prescription. Make your own list and do the best you can to get those mommy goals. Motherhood has made me examine my character so much more. I have a lot of people ask me if I am sad that I won't be getting a Mothers Day gift since that is something the dad usually helps with. Last year I didn't get a Mothers Day gift but Boston had one of her first smiles for me and that was better than anything I could have asked for. This year I hope she gives me extra hugs and smiles and laughs even more (ok, and maybe lets me sleep in). She is my gift.

I BELIEVE IN THE MOM I WANT TO BECOME

XO:
Ashlynn&Boston BRONSON

And if you are wanting to judge me and think I am ignoring my child to write this be aware I am writing this on my lunch break at work. Seriously, readers I love all of the kind messages that have been pouring in. You nice words to me and Boston are so helpful and needed. I appreciate them all so much. .