hate

Boston is wrapping up her first little summer visit with her dad and I am extremely excited for her to come back to her home. I have worked way more than I like to... but I am pretty excited about the next paycheck and I am getting some stuff done to my teeth! If you know me then you know that physically they have always been my biggest insecurity (I still have baby teeth). Anyways with having a little extra time I have found out what my worst habit is....

I am a grudge holder... If you did me wrong I will NEVER forgive you; especially if the wrong you did involved my baby or my family. I just cant forgive people. I know, I know in Doctrine and Covenants 64:10 (from my religion) it states, "I will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men." So, I try to work on it, because the good book say's I should... but, really I have never been that great at following the good book.

This is what I am coming to terms with though... hating someone really ends up hurting you worse than it does them. It really is like that saying hating someone is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. It eats you up, it consumes you and it can destroy so many good things that can come into your life. I need to work on my grudge holding capabilities, only really for my own benefit. I know it will to never be something I can forget, but maybe it may eventually something I can learn to forgive. Learn to accept the apologies that will never come. If you have mastered that trait teach me your ways.

XO:
Ashlynn

..Time heals all wounds. And if it doesn't, you name them something other than wounds and agree to let them stay...... 

Hate sucks. It's such an intense emotion that I wish I could get rid of.