Growing my Heart

  The moment Boston was born she came out believing (okay knowing) that her moms world revolves completely around her. I mean, let's go back a bit further, ever since conception mama's world was Boston; I would sing to her each night while she was in my tummy. Then when she got here I would sing that same song to her while she was rocked. I have probably never told her "no" when she asks for something (probably not something I should admit). If you were to look up, "Spoiled Only Child" in the dictionary you would probably see a picture of her smiling. This is all my doing and I take responsibility for it. I don't know how to use tough love. I probably don't even know how to parent right. Once I gave her a spankin'... I ended up crying for the next 45 minutes and she consoled me. My world has completely revolved around her... It's always been just us two (I mean look at the website for our blog) and I think I tried to overcompensate because of the single parent home she was growing up in.

The past bit their has been a second person Boston has had to share my love and attention with. I have been dating Tanner and I honestly can't describe how happy he makes. I love smiling so much. I didn't know it was possible to be constantly happy. Even more than that I love how much Boston loves him. She asks when his work will be done so he can come eat (usually cook) dinner, he helps her with bike riding and took her on a little date including bringing her flowers (my mom heart melted). The other night he played with her while I bathed and for the first time I wasn't stressed about her cutting her hair or destroying he house. I love having a teammate. I have only known taking care of her by myself and his help has been so welcome. He is everything I have prayed for Boston and I to have since the moment I knew she was coming into this world. 

I love him. She loves him. But, Boston is beginning to notice moms world doesn't revolve only around her. They both play complete different roles in my life and I love that my heart is growing and will grow even more for a few more people shortly but it's an adjustment. I always said I love Kit Kats and I love Reese's Peanut Butter Cups the same but way differently and I guess that's how it is for people who you love, too. Just like him and I need, "date nights" Boston might still need, "'mom and me nights" like we are doing this weekend.  I just don't want to slack on my love for either of them so if you have any advice on how to do this send me all of the (kind) advice you can my way.

Right not life is like a pretty cool fairy tale... You know the one where the princess made a bunch of stupid choices, got pregnant, raised her beautiful daughter by herself, then eventually her Prince Charming came for both of them and life continues every day to get better and better. So, it's not an actual fairy tale but it should be because the ending is going to be amazing. I'm just new to this concept of being a mom and being in love and I want to make sure it's completely done right. All I know is the universe is finally on my side. Life is exciting! For the first time in a long time I am so excited to see what the future holds not just for Boston but for me as well. 

XO:

Ashlynn&Boston

BRONSON

We love him!